otago massacre


it’s dead by ophalm
July 27, 2010, 9:40 pm
Filed under: meta

ophalm

ophalm

this site is dead just check this shit out

as you can see it’s in a vegetable state right now. don’t ever expect anything from here again, except maybe another “this site is over” post in a few weeks just as a reminder that it is in fact dead. to be honest though I’m a bit proud of how many people (bots) are still visiting this place and to be even more honest this post will probably attract a few too. its fucked but so is your future so we’re all on the same level

also critic is p child like this year thumbs down homo jo



thursday wordshit #3 by criticalwat
March 19, 2010, 2:11 am
Filed under: meta, nonsensical

Campus Shop

I really like V and pepsi!  Please keep up the good work at providing everyone with V and Pepsi!! Also I appericate the joy you bring to the process of buying a nice bottle of Pepsi followed up by a $4 sandwhich or a $7 microwavable burger.

Critic

it is very good. keep up the good work guys 🙂 I look forward to reading more informative articles in the future on what people are doing in the halls and student politics! also I think you should cover topics about how sometimes freshers drink too much and do more reviews so we can find out what more students think about things!

I also find the suggestion that people would read critic instead of listening in lectures very funny and bears repeating every issue! If I see someone reading critic in class instead of taking notes I will inform them of that.

Another thing I like alot is how you take comics from the internet like XKCD and viruscomix and put them in your print magazine! I like that a lot since I don’t always have printer paper at home and you almost always manage to find the comics that reflect my tastes as a student. 

My personal favourite however is how the student interview column “Bunch Of Fives” takes up a whole page filled with what my fellow student accosted around the link (I sit there!) think!



Thursday Wordshit #2 by criticalwat
March 11, 2010, 3:28 pm
Filed under: drinking culture, drugs, horrible

criticalwat

Today is thursday so I will write words for you to read.

Energy Drink Review
Lo-Carb Monster Energy 500ml can

so good for you,it’ll probably give you cancer before it makes you fatter

Taste: Like how bubblegum flavoured V would taste but less sugary. As you could imagine it leaves a little bit of an aftertaste

Marketing Spiel:

Pretty retarded. By energy drink standards its better then the  macho shit mother and demon spouts as well as Relentless’s whole “Suffer for your ART” thing…still they could of said everything that needed saying about the product in the second last line

“Tear into a can of the meanest energy drink on the planet. LO CARB MONSTER ENERGY.

We went down to the lab and performed major surgery on the Monster. We hacked out the carbohydrates and calories,transplanted the massive buzz and dialed in the flavor.

Lo-Carb Monster Energy still delivers the big bad buzz you know and love but only has a fraction of the calories

Unleash The Beast!”

Mixed with alcohol: What are you retarded? This shit is bad enough for you already. If you have to I guess it wouldn’t mix too badly as a replacement to red bull in a jägerbomb in terms of taste since its not as strong tasting as red bull.

Strength: As its not a “nutritional supplement” (some drinks like NOS try to get more caffeine in their drinks by calling them that) its about average for a 500ml drink. Mother and Demon are a little bit stronger though.

Price: I paid about $3.20 from Rob Roy. I think thats pretty standard

Other: This stuff smells really strongly of bubblegum even once the can is empty. Its actually kinda weird

Computer Tip

edit: dropbox has a web interface. disregard my bullshit

Also a tip for windows users. try opening up msconfig every so often and unchecking the stuff you don’t absolutely need at startup in the startup tab. This will save a lot of time when you start your computer.

You can do this by opening up Run (should be under accessories depending on your version of windows) and typing in msconfig to open the program.

Then just click on startup and uncheck stuff you don’t think you need. Remember you can just open up apps as you need them anyway



you’re probably a computer failure by mrobotham

mrobotham

I’m here to set you straight on a few things. see, I’m somewhat of a legend when it comes to computers and so when I see 99% of students using their computers I get personally offended by just how terribly people use them. it’s not entirely their faults, modern operating systems do far more than most people need and therefore make it far easier to fuck up than it should be. I keep my operating system running like a finely tuned ferrari whilst others retain a tractor like quality.

what your computer deserves

it’s far too hard to try to explain how people should really use their computers because if you’re not into them there is simply far too much to get your head around as to why you would even need to do some things. that and people are terrified of change (losers in other words). so I’ve got some handy tips which might make your life a bit better

use dropbox.. why? it’s 2gb of free online storage which is cool in of itself, but it also has a program that automatically syncs it with a folder on your computer.. what does this mean? you have a folder on your computer called “MyDropBox” and anything you put in there is automatically uploaded to the internet. this is where all you morons should save all your important files like essays and shit so that when your computer dies it’s all still available on the internet. backups without thinking. it also retains old versions in case you fuck up.. what makes this program extra special though is that if you install it on two (or more) computers and use the same account, it links them. save a file on one computer, it uploads to the internet and then automatically downloads to the other computer, keeping it all in sync. it’s perfect for retards such as yourselves

and also before when I said handy “tips” I meant “tip”

fuck you



Criticalwats Thursday Thing by criticalwat
March 4, 2010, 5:30 pm
Filed under: politics, student life, uni

criticalwat

Welcome First Years. If you are reading this you aren’t rioting so get to it you little shits..I’m not sure who is posting this year apart from that red cups guy. First thing I need to get out of the way is that the coffee in the link still sucks.. Go anywhere but there really unless you are into “ironically” drinking shitty coffee.

The other is Clubs and societies. If you are interested in doing stuff at university apart from pulling all night study and drinking bottles of horse urine you should probably join a club. There are four types of clubs that you can join

*Sports Clubs: In where you play sports which usually involves chasing balls around and getting really sweaty.

*Religious/Political Clubs: In where you advertise to the world how wrong you are about everything

*Hobby Clubs: In where you slowly become obsessed with your new found skill at t-shirt printing until you are found years later in a dark one bedroom apartment buried under a pile of shirts with “witty” slogans on them.

*KAOS: In where you hunt the most cunning prey of all (man)

If you are interested in joining any of those clubs you should probably become familiar with the push for the university to adopt VSM. VSM is similar to V.D. in that if you don’t take proper precautions you will likely cause your genitals to become a fertile breeding ground for all kinds of nasty organisms..you should probably oppose it unless you are cool with sharing your pants with a fungal colony.

puppies and sunshine and little bunnies



criticalwat is back (to using unessecary parenthesis ) by criticalwat
March 3, 2010, 6:43 pm
Filed under: meta

criticalwat

Just putting in an update to say I am going to update semi regularly this year..

Usually one post every Thursday (starting tomorrow). There isn’t really going to be any set theme but if i post something that you like,tell me and i’ll try to post more stuff like it. Likewise if I post something you dislike tell me and i’ll try to post less of it.



red cups by mrobotham
February 28, 2010, 3:25 pm
Filed under: drinking culture, drugs, student life | Tags: , , ,

mrobotham

fuck red cups

but before I get into it, I’ve designed a song to be listened to while this article is being read, it’s essential
right click into new tab (it’ll play automatically) to listen to AMBS.mp3

anyway, red cups.
an exploration to the bottle store yesterday left me weary and depressed. at the counter I saw not one but more than one packets of red cups

what just are these red cups? the concept of a red cup doesn’t bother my per se, what does is these red cups in particular. the semi-disposable semi-reusable red plastic cups that have been in american college movies for as long as I can remember

what about it makes me so furious? I guess it’s just sad to see our weak culture as it is be drowned out and diluted by copying shitty things that happen in north america

because you know what comes with red cups? beer pong. one of the rudest sports known to man

and keg stands fall under the same category. the saddest attempts at drinking based masculinity

and it’s not necessarily that these things are bad in of themselves, it’s just so shameful that people in our delightful little nation lack the ability to create their own drinking culture but have to steal shit off the most horrible of western nations and be north americas little brother, trying desperately to copy for no reason other than that they are doing it

and today my friends (you’re not really my friends) you have been shown a little bit of insight into why most of the people around you are worthless cunts. you should still love them of course but secretly hate them a little inside every day

if it’s not a rage you feel then it’s surely a wetness that can only be described as “haunting” and you should feel ashamed although I’m sure shame is a feeling you’re more than familiar with