Filed under: meta
ophalm
this site is dead just check this shit out
as you can see it’s in a vegetable state right now. don’t ever expect anything from here again, except maybe another “this site is over” post in a few weeks just as a reminder that it is in fact dead. to be honest though I’m a bit proud of how many people (bots) are still visiting this place and to be even more honest this post will probably attract a few too. its fucked but so is your future so we’re all on the same level
also critic is p child like this year thumbs down homo jo
Today is thursday so I will write words for you to read.
Energy Drink Review
Lo-Carb Monster Energy 500ml can
so good for you,it’ll probably give you cancer before it makes you fatter
Taste: Like how bubblegum flavoured V would taste but less sugary. As you could imagine it leaves a little bit of an aftertaste
Marketing Spiel:
Pretty retarded. By energy drink standards its better then the macho shit mother and demon spouts as well as Relentless’s whole “Suffer for your ART” thing…still they could of said everything that needed saying about the product in the second last line
“Tear into a can of the meanest energy drink on the planet. LO CARB MONSTER ENERGY.
We went down to the lab and performed major surgery on the Monster. We hacked out the carbohydrates and calories,transplanted the massive buzz and dialed in the flavor.
Lo-Carb Monster Energy still delivers the big bad buzz you know and love but only has a fraction of the calories
Unleash The Beast!”
Mixed with alcohol: What are you retarded? This shit is bad enough for you already. If you have to I guess it wouldn’t mix too badly as a replacement to red bull in a jägerbomb in terms of taste since its not as strong tasting as red bull.
Strength: As its not a “nutritional supplement” (some drinks like NOS try to get more caffeine in their drinks by calling them that) its about average for a 500ml drink. Mother and Demon are a little bit stronger though.
Price: I paid about $3.20 from Rob Roy. I think thats pretty standard
Other: This stuff smells really strongly of bubblegum even once the can is empty. Its actually kinda weird
Computer Tip
edit: dropbox has a web interface. disregard my bullshit
Also a tip for windows users. try opening up msconfig every so often and unchecking the stuff you don’t absolutely need at startup in the startup tab. This will save a lot of time when you start your computer.
You can do this by opening up Run (should be under accessories depending on your version of windows) and typing in msconfig to open the program.
Then just click on startup and uncheck stuff you don’t think you need. Remember you can just open up apps as you need them anyway
Filed under: entertainment, philosophy | Tags: and last but not least, computers, fuck shoehorsing, internet, jizz badgering, worthless
I’m here to set you straight on a few things. see, I’m somewhat of a legend when it comes to computers and so when I see 99% of students using their computers I get personally offended by just how terribly people use them. it’s not entirely their faults, modern operating systems do far more than most people need and therefore make it far easier to fuck up than it should be. I keep my operating system running like a finely tuned ferrari whilst others retain a tractor like quality.
what your computer deserves
it’s far too hard to try to explain how people should really use their computers because if you’re not into them there is simply far too much to get your head around as to why you would even need to do some things. that and people are terrified of change (losers in other words). so I’ve got some handy tips which might make your life a bit better
use dropbox.. why? it’s 2gb of free online storage which is cool in of itself, but it also has a program that automatically syncs it with a folder on your computer.. what does this mean? you have a folder on your computer called “MyDropBox” and anything you put in there is automatically uploaded to the internet. this is where all you morons should save all your important files like essays and shit so that when your computer dies it’s all still available on the internet. backups without thinking. it also retains old versions in case you fuck up.. what makes this program extra special though is that if you install it on two (or more) computers and use the same account, it links them. save a file on one computer, it uploads to the internet and then automatically downloads to the other computer, keeping it all in sync. it’s perfect for retards such as yourselves
and also before when I said handy “tips” I meant “tip”
fuck you
Welcome First Years. If you are reading this you aren’t rioting so get to it you little shits..I’m not sure who is posting this year apart from that red cups guy. First thing I need to get out of the way is that the coffee in the link still sucks.. Go anywhere but there really unless you are into “ironically” drinking shitty coffee.
The other is Clubs and societies. If you are interested in doing stuff at university apart from pulling all night study and drinking bottles of horse urine you should probably join a club. There are four types of clubs that you can join
*Sports Clubs: In where you play sports which usually involves chasing balls around and getting really sweaty.
*Religious/Political Clubs: In where you advertise to the world how wrong you are about everything
*Hobby Clubs: In where you slowly become obsessed with your new found skill at t-shirt printing until you are found years later in a dark one bedroom apartment buried under a pile of shirts with “witty” slogans on them.
*KAOS: In where you hunt the most cunning prey of all (man)
If you are interested in joining any of those clubs you should probably become familiar with the push for the university to adopt VSM. VSM is similar to V.D. in that if you don’t take proper precautions you will likely cause your genitals to become a fertile breeding ground for all kinds of nasty organisms..you should probably oppose it unless you are cool with sharing your pants with a fungal colony.
puppies and sunshine and little bunnies
Filed under: meta
Just putting in an update to say I am going to update semi regularly this year..
Usually one post every Thursday (starting tomorrow). There isn’t really going to be any set theme but if i post something that you like,tell me and i’ll try to post more stuff like it. Likewise if I post something you dislike tell me and i’ll try to post less of it.
Filed under: drinking culture, drugs, student life | Tags: beer pong, drinking culture, keg stands, red cups
fuck red cups
but before I get into it, I’ve designed a song to be listened to while this article is being read, it’s essential
right click into new tab (it’ll play automatically) to listen to AMBS.mp3
anyway, red cups.
an exploration to the bottle store yesterday left me weary and depressed. at the counter I saw not one but more than one packets of red cups
what just are these red cups? the concept of a red cup doesn’t bother my per se, what does is these red cups in particular. the semi-disposable semi-reusable red plastic cups that have been in american college movies for as long as I can remember
what about it makes me so furious? I guess it’s just sad to see our weak culture as it is be drowned out and diluted by copying shitty things that happen in north america
because you know what comes with red cups? beer pong. one of the rudest sports known to man
and keg stands fall under the same category. the saddest attempts at drinking based masculinity
and it’s not necessarily that these things are bad in of themselves, it’s just so shameful that people in our delightful little nation lack the ability to create their own drinking culture but have to steal shit off the most horrible of western nations and be north americas little brother, trying desperately to copy for no reason other than that they are doing it
and today my friends (you’re not really my friends) you have been shown a little bit of insight into why most of the people around you are worthless cunts. you should still love them of course but secretly hate them a little inside every day
if it’s not a rage you feel then it’s surely a wetness that can only be described as “haunting” and you should feel ashamed although I’m sure shame is a feeling you’re more than familiar with
Filed under: rant, student life | Tags: "funny", start of semester, students, university
mrobotham
one of the greatest things of our mighty exploitative society is the fact that we have enough leisure time to use and extra resources to make glossy magazines for teenage girls to hone their marketed lifestyles
what makes it so amazing is that they sometimes contain lists
like bullet pointed lists that help to inform
of things that are “funny”/”interesting”/”ironic”/”generic as old people”
lists can be made by many people and in fact it’s likely your children will learn to one day make a “list”. this isn’t anything to worry about because I mean even you yourself have a pretty good idea exactly that lists are perfectly normal for people to make and use but they are also extremely effective at a number of tasks and frankly if you couldn’t make lists then it’s time for at least some of us to become afraid.
id cards not a fan of getting them. i mean, I’m going to look like that for an entire year. not that it matters because usually the only people who need to see your ids are old people at end of semester, or if you’re lucky enough to walk into the social interaction that is “looking at other people’s identification”
course confirmation oh fucking god lining up in the link beside the side library entrance is something we all have to do (notice the vivid imagery I have projected into your mind)
PIMS man PIMS is like the friend that you have, but you don’t really ever see him until you need to use him for something he has access to but no-one else does. you may treate PIMS kinda like “your bitch” and if you do I don’t respect you
everyone is coming back or has come back already. some never left. it’s an interesection of human beings in a local community. people are really friendly at the moment. the sad stress of having to go to lectures and pay attention if you want marks takes it’s toll from the very second you go to your preliminary lecture. you’re almost a wee bit excited to get into it and you go there eager and keen – but reality shoves the foot in because from the start time you’re looking at the handouts going “fuck….*fuck*“. I think they should have an anonymous question and answer time where students and lecturer are thrust together in a battle for redemption. students think that it matters but the reality borne by the actions of the administration proves to us the age old knowledge come to life – that those above you rule your ass
rats I have this word in my head and I keep coming back to it when I try to think of another item for the list. it’s unusual because I normally have “dog” arrived in my head whenever I consult it for “random topic for the sake of arbitrariness”
stay hydrated you’re probably dehydrated. it must be a statistical certainty I’m sure – since I don’t drink enough water and I am not an outlier.
or don’t. just eat lots of vegetables and fresh if possible! but don’t not eat em. drink water too.
and so my list is over. some people put more effort into lists and some people even consider some lists important enough that they are to be worked on over the course of more than one quick session. lists like that must be pretty fucking cool and I think I can probably spot a list like that but as far as lists that I personally make it’s just not going to happen since if there is one thing I lack in my repertoire it’s anything good
Filed under: meta
well it’s another year
and what of it?
I’ve spent the last couple months doing a lot of things, and one of them has been debating what to do with this site
and the conclusion is: just leave it the fuck alone..
it’s tempting almost to crank it back up for another year, but I don’t want just another year. it would have to be bigger and better than last year. and that would require money. I almost emailed a couple of places (the cook and PB technology) about sponsorshop, in fact I did email the cook but I must have put the wrong address in as it bounced back and my motivation was scarred..
(it also doesn’t help that wordpress is fucking out on me all the time. you just can’t get good shit for free no-more)
and so without money I can’t find a way to encourage more content and my mind has run out of wit and so while I’m not going to shut this down, don’t expect any kind of regular update or anything ever again.. unless for some reason there is massive public outcry but it’s unlikely seeing as I don’t think this site was really all that popular anyway
of course if other people want to contribute they can, if someone wants to take over I might even hand over the reigns if they seem worthy enough.. but these things are unlikely and I’m only putting them here to make it seem like there is a possibility something else may ever be posted here
otago massacre 