otago massacre


txts, rants, politics, teenagers and you
July 26, 2009, 8:23 pm
Filed under: guide, horrible | Tags:

lois weathers

So I know the stereotype is that women send out mixed messages and we’re all emotional and insane, and I’m not saying we’re not but lately it seems to me that the male gender are turning into females. They put messages all out there, half the time these messages dont make any sense because they dont know how to send them out properly and they leave girls confused and upset. Then they just dont understand when we are all pissed off at them.
I’m here to explain why we are pissed off at you and what you can do to fix it.

I think a big factor in this mixed messages dilemma is “txt politics”. Now am I mistaken in thinking only girls take part in txt politics and boys just say whatever??.. Because if so I don’t believe you. So Im just going to inform you of a few basic txt rules… Never say “K” we think you’re pissed of at us and get really defensive and will more often than not reply with “whtever” Its not too much to ask for, just txt “Ok” or “K :)”. “K” on its own is asking for a fight. Another big one is overall friendlyness of the txt, be sure to put a smiley or an xo in it somewhere or again we will think you’re pissed off at us and get defensive. Now if you dont know if your txt is friendly enough just add in an over happy smiley face to be sure, you can never have a to happy txt. The most important txt rule is where you put your full stops and how many of them you put, a full stop in a txt will usually signify you want to stop talking to them and are cutting conversation, “K.” is the worst txt ever to recieve. Its like a slap in the face, if there is no need for a full stop dont put one in. Another thing for boys and girls is txting when you are drunk, two words for you there “NOT OKAY” there are no good outcomes from this, never, ever, do you get me? It just leads to an akward txt in the morning that will go something like “l0l soz gt s000 wastd lst nite, I thnk I snt u sumthn bt ma phne dusnt save snt msgs. l0l 😀 XxLoisxX” and Im telling you for a fact that whoever sent you that knows exactly what they sent you last night and has been re-writting that message for an hour with input from friends. And they will be next to their phone for the next 5 hours with friends around them until you reply so they can craft a perfect message back to you.

So if you’re ever confused as to why your girlfriend or friend is giving you the cold shoulder take a look in your outbox and you’ll soon find the answer, if you have fucked up and god forbid txted her saying “K.” you need to put infinate smileys and xo’s after every txt message, and then every now and then txt her something pointless like “Lol Jamal just tripd over, it was so funny :-D!! :S!” so that she doesnt have to reply and she feels like she has the upper hand. LOL

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trips away
July 21, 2009, 9:07 pm
Filed under: guide | Tags: , , , , , , ,

lois weathers

A lot of people went away in this mid semester break and I was one of them, And I’m going to share my awesome experiences with you so next semester break you may be able to break away from this hell hole. I’m going to start off by saying that it’s not cheap but smart students know this is what course related costs are for; however even with the $1000 the government gives out so willingly you still need to be prudish to have several trips away over the entire year. Or alternatively if you’re kind of a loser you can go with your parents who are so eager to see you they will probably pay for the entire trip and you won’t starve.

parents

a promising start to a holiday with your parents

Now the first thing to decide is where you going, this can be determined by a multitude of things. Often it comes down to if you or one of your friends knows someone who knows someone with a pad you can crash at because you’re too poor to pay for accommodation. Now if you don’t know anyone anywhere with a pad you can crash at the next cheapest option is to go bush and get a tent, this comes with the problem of freezing cold temperatures especially at this time of the year. I would not advise sleeping in your car unless you have a van of some sort as the cramped confined space will make you want to kill yourself and everyone around you.

tent

no tent site looks like this

If the tent or car isn’t an option you need to go to a backpackers. Now these can range in price and you’re going to want to hunt to find the cheapest. In my experience knowing someone was the best, they gave you a nice wee place with no time limit and all it cost was a box of chocolates. The backpackers was nice and I meet some great people but you knew how much it was costing you and that is a buzz kill. I never tried the tent so if you have feel free to comment on the pros/cons of that. Of course the best of all is going with your parents who will put you up in a motel with sky tv and your own en suite.

backpackers

there is a stereotypical backer image, and this embodies it more than anything in the universe

So once you’ve decided where you are headed you need to decide what you are going to do there. This is very important and should have come up when you were deciding where you were going but it didn’t because you were focused on accommodation. You need not worry what you are going to do if you’re on a trip with your parents because they have endless money and constantly want to shower you with goods. On my trip with my mum we went on the train trip across NZ. It was $120 return and there was little time to be drunk (however the lady in the seat next to us managed it). The trip in which I was given a wee house by someone we knew was in queenstown and there were plenty of things to do and because accommodation cost was not an issue we could spend more on activities. Alternatively bushwalks are a nice free way to spend the day and day picnics are just lovely.

The last issue everyone comes to is food, thats some expensive shit. I have 3 words for you, Up n Go. That shit is filling and you only need one in the morning and one at around 3oclock. Im not guna say you wont be hungry, you will and it’ll be difficult going back to solids after just having up n go for a week, but you wont die and thats all that really matters.
So please take some of my helpful words of wisdom on your next trip away, and please don’t brag about how mean and sick your trip was when you get back cos thats just kinda annoying and to be honest no one cares where you went they’re just glad they didn’t have to see your fucking face every day. LOL

up&go is unfortunately not this psychedelic

up&go is unfortunately not this psychedelic



a girl bitches about girls
July 15, 2009, 6:00 am
Filed under: guide, horrible, meta, rant | Tags: , , , ,

lois weathers

Girls are insane.
We dont share, we dislike people for no apparent reason and we cry constantly. What happened to us huh guys? Why do we fight against each other so much? And why is it almost always over boys?! Its reached a pathetic stage; we need to grow up and learn from past mistakes. And since when did facebook become our lives? There is no need to update it by txt, noone cares what you’re doing that much

First off, the flirting thing. Yes it feels good to be flirted with, lets you know you’re still hawt and gives a wee spike of fun if you’re in a relationship – jealous guys are hot.
But is it really worth it when a non-single girl you know fancies this other boy too and is also trying to flirt with him? That’s verging on mean right? I mean sure if you’re single and he’s single, the other bitch is just competition and you need to stamp her out, but if you’ve already got one you need to back the fuck off.

flirt

nothing like stock imagery to make a post more complete

Second if you see someone flirting with a good looking guy and he’s flirting back dont fuck up the situation by going over there and saying some dumb shit, that’s again mean. These things may seem small to begin with, I mean it was just some dumb guy and we all know they are stupid. But girls seem to take these small insignificant things and blow them up to gigantic proportions and next thing you know those two girls are sworn enemies and all of the friends of each of the girls have to hate the other and it just forms these giant cliques that are so irritating because then if your friend hates this girl because she ruined her almost relationship with that guy (which by the way was never going to be anything because lets face it casual elevator flirting isnt really going to turn into a marrage (but the stupid thing is that even though you think it will, it won’t!! and you aren’t the exception that it’s totally going to happen for, it’s just not happening)) but anyway then you can’t borrow that cool dress she had that totally fitted you because your friend hates her then you totally want that dress so you have to secretly visit the other girl who you friend hates to get this dress and next thing you know you’re in two cliques and you can’t be in two cliques, whose side are you on if you’re in both cliques!?!? I hope girls are reading this and realising how bullshit it sounds. Please just get over yourself. It’s irritating cos as Im writing this I can tell people will be like “But sarah totally fuked me over way more than those other stories” I just want you to step back and take a good look at why you actually hate “sarah” and try and understand that its a bull shit reason.
LOL



Blondes have more Fun
May 28, 2009, 3:43 pm
Filed under: philosophy | Tags: , , , ,

poasted by lois weathers

So recently I have dyed my hair blonde. I would like to say I did so as an experiment that I could then base this amazing article on, but unfortunatly the main reason for the drastic dye was severe peer pressure from a friend of mine; thanks Van. And im going to share with you the exciting new things that happened to me as a blonde.

brunette1

from this

First I would like you all to know I wasnt kinda blonde and just went a wee bit lighter, I had dark brown hair and its now like a white blonde. I just want to advise children not to do this at home, it burns like something really sore and ouchy and *@$#%^ mainly just pay the money and get a professional. But for those of you who are cheap and keen for a fun exciting bonding experiance with your bestest friend then might I suggest “myhd”, they sell it at that new life pharmacy in the new mall and you can use it several times to get rid of that nasty re-growth. Be sure to get a toner as well to make it actually blonde because the peroxide just turnes it white. Talk to the lady she’s very helpful.

to this

to this

But the question you brunetts are all asking me is “Is life truely greener on the other side”. And in my honest opinion, after the burny and the ouchy. . . ITS FUCKING AMAZING! DO IT DO IT NOW. Being blonde is amazing, people look at you like your automatically hot and good in bed. One week after I went blonde I was getting some (and not candy) from this really good looking guy that I had been working on (as a brunett) for quiet some time. No, actually not one week, NO OMG now that I remember, it was actually first time he saw me with blonde hair. Thats how well it worked!!

brunette2

from this

People notice you when you walk down the street and to be honest Im pretty sure they’re all undressing me with their eyes. The other day a good looking guy bought me a drink and asked me to dance at this gig we were at. This shit never happened to me when I was a brunett!!! At the present I am testing if it is my personal reaction to myself as a blonde that is making me seem more attractive to the opposite sex (I feel better about myself so others are attracted to that), or if it is in fact just the blonde. I’ll keep you updated. And boys who read this could you post if blonde hair is really attractive or if it her “personality”.

blonde1

to this

The main issue with the blonde is that im killing my hair follicles and am constantly paranoid my hair is going to fall out, and I know I wont be able to keep it up forever and will soon have to go back to the dull dull life of a brunett. But if you are brown or black haired and reading this.. Be happy with who you are, your beautiful no matter what I say and my words wont bring you down 😀

LOL



Surcharges. What the shit!?!?
April 22, 2009, 8:20 pm
Filed under: drugs, dunedin, entertainment, horrible | Tags: , , ,

poasted by lois weathers

So I’m just a kid right, new to the whole bar scene. But don’t be fooled, I’m adaptable, I’ve gotten into it like a fish in water. Or as it be fresher in a pool of booze and barf.

This whole bar scene is very exciting, Im not a major piss fiend myself but I enjoy a social drink or two. And I rock some moves on the D floor. I have however seen the hard core piss fiends that seem to really enjoy getting so fucked up they cant even walk… with their scrumpy bottles attached to their hands, lying on the vomit covered ground. Sick fucks. Anywho. As you can see I think binge drinking is a really big issue in Dunedin. Otago is really seen as a party uni and that you can get by hungover. Some of you may find it really fun getting wasted and having to get a new liver later on in life but I think a few people are on my track and enjoy maybe one or two drinks and a fun night dancing. But those money hungry bar owners wont take that shit.

You may remember a while ago the bowler did this deal in which you would get a cheaper deal buying 5 or 6 of one drink than you would only buying 1 or 2. So the bargin deal makes us think we HAVE to get 6. Then suddenly your left with 6 drinks all at the same time that you have to skull down. The DCC went down hard on this as uni students were getting really fucked up and smashing shit. Now most money hungry bars would take this as a warning and most did until they came up with this new plot. Now this one is tricky to see through. Ten bar has a surcharge of $5 they put at the door. At first I was like “what the fuck makes 10 bar so fucking special!?” I mean they have sticky floors and urine/vomit covered toilets just like the rest of the bars. Why should I pay $5 to listen to the same music that’s in every other place? Then the bouncer kindly informed me that you got a free tequilla shot with it. I was interested a his definition that the shot was “free”.

But was it really? I was paying $5 to get in… And then getting a drink. Seems a bit fishy to me. What if I was sober driver for my friends?? I paid to get into the bar, and then their offering me this free shot. Whats a kid to do? And the choice of a shot was really a masterful one. As most people want some other drink after to get the rancid taste of tequila out of thier mouth. This is just asking for uni students to go in and get fucked up and smash some shit. But they’ve done it in this cunning way called a “surcharge”
Just wait man, my prediction is that soon every bar will have a “surcharge” that come with a “free” drink and then the worst will happen. Soon there will just be surcharges with no drink!!! Say no now dunedin!! We don’t want to be Sydney!!!!
BOYCOT THE SURCHARGE
Thanks for reading. LOL



The Environment, we’re killing it/sex it would seem
April 3, 2009, 7:00 am
Filed under: philosophy | Tags: , ,

poasted by lois weathers

So there seems to be a big issue lately about how we’re killing the world around us and how its not too good for our future and our kids future. Personally I have no kids so it doesn’t worry me too much, but I know some people with some kids and on interviewing one he said “I’d rather my child didn’t grow up in the future”. Big words for big opinions.

nature

It seems to me we do a lot of things to try and help our environment out, but no-one seems to really care that much. As ophalm said in his piece Earth Hourailure we failed to put our lights out for a measly hour. This is truly sad, but even if we did manage to turn our lights out for that hour, what difference would it make? They would’ve been straight back on again the next night. And really do lights use that much power. In fact I’ll research it now…..
Boy did I find out some interesting shit just then, so get this; top result was “3.5% drop in power over Earth hour” I decided to research further and read this article from the ODT, I found it hilarious that to celebrate Earth Hour there were concerts held in Christchurch. Now is it just me or do concerts require a lot of electricity (aka power) to play the music? This kind of counteracts the turning off your power thing… See how smart we are!! But the second website was one about how much of our power is used on heat pumps and other heating devices . I think next year we should try turning off our lights and heaters/heat pumps and on top of that, maybe not hold any energy consuming concerts.

Now I’m going to share something personal with you all. I am doing a teaching degree and in that I learn what we are going to teach kids. They have this new thing right, you wouldn’t know about it. Its called ‘inquiry’ where they teach kids new and important things, they focus on one topic a term. And one of their topics is ‘Sustainability’.
They learn how to sustain our environment and what they can use instead of fossil fuels etc. Its almost as if we’re saying “Hey kids we fucked up so we’re relying on you to fix it, we know you’re only about 8, but any idea is a good idea, we’ve fucked it up so bad”
This is worrying as I’ve heard some of the kid’s ideas and they don’t seem to make too much sense. For example a boy I was talking to the other day told me that he could make a potato light….. I see where he’s coming from here and its a valid idea, but I don’t think we will ever have enough potatoes to power a city. And even if we did it wouldn’t be that bright, people would have eyesight problems due to the poor lighting, old people would die with their respirators failing, an entire generation of gen X-Box children would be dropped into reality cold turkey and it’s be more like what civilisation was like 100s of years ago *shudders*. Its a shame really as potatoes are an amazing vegetable, they really make a meal, a meal.

potato

So what I’m trying to tell you is that I know it might be hard to care about your environment and at some times you might just want to throw some rubbish out the window, but unless you want to live in a city that smells like potatoes and is poorly lit then lets try and calm down on the overusage of our power. Oh by the way nothing in this page has anything to do with sex I just noticed that my last article mentioned sex and got more hits. Sorry I fooled you. LOL



technology/sex it would seem
March 26, 2009, 1:54 pm
Filed under: horrible, uni | Tags: ,

poasted by lois weathers

Now technology is a big thing in the 21st century and what people need to learn how to do, if you plan on surviving is know how to use it. Now I’m not claiming to be an expert but I know the basics. I’m typing this out now aren’t I?

So anyway, what people really need to get their heads around is the powerpoint. I had been a powerpoint virgin until just recently, but I got through it ok. It was a bit of a raping but I did it and it worked and everything. What baffles me is the fact that it’s so easy! It’s like this amazing thing that everyone tells you is out of your league but when you actually do it it’s like “whoa why didn’t I do this earlier.” – I realise this paragraph sounds a bit like sex… But I”m unsure as to how else to word it.. I wonder what that says about me as a person

What I’m really ranting at in this article is how lecturers have such trouble with powerpoint. Of course they all use the easiest format “Title and Content” so it’s so boring. And their transition from slide to slide is the same the whole way through, completely losing the students interest.
But the worst thing about the whole ordeal is that they fuck up so royally, I don’t even know how they do this. But they end up at the beginning of the powerpoint all over again and then you have to sit there and make small chit chat with the person next to you as the lecturer finds their place again.
Now as you know from my other works I hate everyone in my classes, and being forced to make awkward chit chat with them because of the teacher’s fuckup – that will no doubt happen again in five minutes – makes me want to knife myself.

doit

Common complications with powerpoint are the age old “Oh no I’ve pressed the forward arrow one too many times and now I don’t know how to get back, maybe if I double click the screen somewhere it’ll go back.. Oh no now look what’s happened it’s gone forward another two slides.. Oh I’ll just get it started again”.
Another goody is “I’ll just click on this link that will take us to a YouTube video.. Oh boy what’s happened here.. Oh I’ll just describe the video to you.. (5 minutes later) Oh it’s working now!”

Another weird thing about powerpoint slides is that they seem to have this effect on students where they feel the urge to write everything on the slide down. Most smart people know that this is impossible because the slides go too fast and you can’t write it all down so they print off the slides prior to the lectures. Even smarter people know that this also is pointless and that there are really only two or three relevant slides in every lecture, so we write those important slides down.
What happens if those slides go by too fast you ask? Well we just copy off the fools who printed out all the slides.

So what I’m saying to all those lecturers out there, is let yourself experiment a bit more with powerpoint, you’ve already gone through the awkward “what’s that, where does this go” stage, and I applaud you for getting this far. But now it is time to fully immerse yourself in powerpoint and go with it. Try different backgrounds, put in some photos with captions next to them. You know you want to. Now do it. LOL